It's been quite a while since we had an update on the trials and tribulations of Shia LaBeouf. May 4th, to be exact. Long-time readers of this site will know that I have a special plase in my heart for that cutie. But today is a new day and we have news that young Master Shia has signed on to Transformers 2 and 3.
Now, now... don't get all excited. These trilogy deals are pretty standard these days. What's interesting though is that Shia seems to think that the Transformers feature film will be his ticket on the Lord of the Rings Gravy Train. In an interview with About.com, Shia compared his work on Bobby with his work on Transformers:
Again, that’s exactly what that is. If anyone tells you they do that for the art value, that’s bulls**t. It’s f**king painful. To go from Emilio Estevez to Michael Bay is like walking out of, you know, like in a hammock in the sky, hanging out drinking Pina Coladas with Jesus and then getting smacked in the face and thrown in the devil’s s**pile and having to make a movie. I swear to God.
Huh wha?? He goes on....
I was thinking about quitting this industry. And Michael Bay will tell you that. He’s so hard on his actors, and not in the way that Emilio might be, in that he’ll push you to be something better. Mike is just f**king a hard a**.
OMG, what a whiny, foul-mouthed little wimp! How could I have been so wrong?
Look, the four, five months of pain I went through might buy my mom a house and that’s forever, so I’m all right. People go to f**king war, it’s not like I have a hard job. I’m an actor. It’s not the worst thing. We’re sitting at a pool, I didn’t pay for those shoes, I didn’t pay for this. It’s not a bad life, and for a guy that didn’t have s**t going on. There’s certain pains; it’s a tradeoff like anything. There’s things you don’t want to do in your industry... You get lost in a f**king weird depression, man... I barely made it out of that movie. I was going to a heart specialist; I was having anxiety attacks, losing my mind. And you know, you’re doing physical s**t all day. It’s tough, man. And even Mike at the end, he was like, ‘Look, I know I’m hard on you but you’ll never get this again. If you can go through this with me, you can do anything.’ Sort of like the whole, ‘If you can live in New York you can live anywhere,” type thing. Whatever doesn’t kill you.
Yeah, yeah... whatever, pansy-boy. I am SO done with you. Oh yeah, and the thing about LOTR...
You don’t get bigger than $250 million robots blowing up the world. I don’t plan on making any other – I mean, I’m going to do Transformers 2 and 3 so that will be my Lord of the Rings.... Yeah, I’m gonna do it. That will be my Lord of the Rings and then I’ll just make indies the rest of my time, for a long time. Elijah [Wood’s] straight. Elijah can do whatever he wants. Why? Because he’s in one of the biggest, the top five grossers ever. People in China know who he is and people in Iceland know who he is. He can do whatever he wants. That’s my whole thing is I’ve got to get to the point where people in Iceland will go see Guide to Recognizing Your Saints. That’s what I’m trying to do... It’s a tough deal but again, it was tough to go from the kid thing to the adult thing. That was the toughest jump you can do in this business.
Sheesh... he sounds like Drew Barrymore coming off her E.T. gig. Who would have known? You know what? He's not even THAT cute...

